I think I invented a new global economy
So I recently traveled to Utah and the airport shuttle company sent a kick ass Town Car to carry me home. Rock. A van-less ride meant no loud-talking resort vacationers, six-person-perspective discussions about weather and time zones, or children playing the IRL version of iFart.
And then the driver let me know there was one other passenger.
One-on-one small talk with strangers always makes me nervous. There's only so long I can hold off before I accidentally interject something about time travel, alien politicians or Vuclans really are the master race into the conversation. And then the other person invariably gets all quiet, stops making eye contact and acts like they never met me before the next time we're introduced.
So without warning the door opens and 'Bob' gets in. And he wants to chit chat. Awesomeness enter stage left. Not.
Bob: <me not listening>Hi, nice to meet you. I just got back from blah blah blah and blah blah. Weather. Time Zone. Blah Blah.</me not listening> I'm in the pet supply industry. <EARS PERK UP!!!>
Me: Dude, that's awesome. I do internet business strategy for a living, but my real passion is coming up with original ideas. The chick who said there's no such thing clearly never met me.
<Bob flashes a patronizing smile>
Bob: Yeah, you guys invented Pac Man and Alien Invaders, right?
Me: No, that's the gaming industry. But enough about what I do. Let's talk about what YOU do. I have to say I'm more than a little interested lately in the human/pet relationship. Just the other day, I wrote a blog post considering the possibilities to take it to the next level.
Now for obvious reasons, I didn't drive too far down the turnpike explaining the nuances of my idea. Clearly 'Bob' was in a position to steal my idea right from under me and not even care enough to buy the associated domain name off of me. He didn't even know the difference between the Intenets and Atari.
So then 'Bob' turned the conversation to middle age frustrations, selling your dreams and 'there's a lot more money to be made in your industry vs. mine'.
Me: But dude, it's only money. Money is not a means to an end. When aliens take, er, I mean when the global economy collapses, what will Bill Gates do with his buckets of money? Or his technology? There WON'T EVEN BE POWER (unless you're in with the aliens I silently said to myself, winking.)
Bob: Yeah, but a nice cold bucket of money sounds good right about now.
Me: That's the problem with the world today. People settling for second best. What's a bucket of money worth compared to a dog? I, for one, would rather have a bucket of dogs, AND I DON'T EVEN LIKE DOGS. I'M AN EFFING CAT PERSON AND I WOULD RATHER HAVE A BUCKET OF DOGS OVER A BUCKET OF MONEY ANY DAY OF THE WEEK.
Then Invariable Silence opened the door of the Town Car and sat down between us. She's a good friend of mine, so I didn't mind so much.
Then it hit me like a bolt of lightening. Dogs are SO money. Imagine a world where you can play frisbee with your cash before you take it to the store (while it's tail is wagging, even)? Unpleasant necessities like buying hemorrhoid medication could turn into a walk in the park. Literally. You won't need an app to tell you what the dill-e-o is on Wall Street today. Just look out your window and see how many loose dogs are running around. Like, Irish Wolf Hounds will be the new hundred dollar bill.
And so I bought it. Before anyone else could. DogsAreCurrency.com. Yeah baby. It's only a matter of time before the Federal Reserve boys come a knockin' on my door.
And then the driver let me know there was one other passenger.
One-on-one small talk with strangers always makes me nervous. There's only so long I can hold off before I accidentally interject something about time travel, alien politicians or Vuclans really are the master race into the conversation. And then the other person invariably gets all quiet, stops making eye contact and acts like they never met me before the next time we're introduced.
So without warning the door opens and 'Bob' gets in. And he wants to chit chat. Awesomeness enter stage left. Not.
Bob: <me not listening>Hi, nice to meet you. I just got back from blah blah blah and blah blah. Weather. Time Zone. Blah Blah.</me not listening> I'm in the pet supply industry. <EARS PERK UP!!!>
Me: Dude, that's awesome. I do internet business strategy for a living, but my real passion is coming up with original ideas. The chick who said there's no such thing clearly never met me.
<Bob flashes a patronizing smile>
Bob: Yeah, you guys invented Pac Man and Alien Invaders, right?
Me: No, that's the gaming industry. But enough about what I do. Let's talk about what YOU do. I have to say I'm more than a little interested lately in the human/pet relationship. Just the other day, I wrote a blog post considering the possibilities to take it to the next level.
Now for obvious reasons, I didn't drive too far down the turnpike explaining the nuances of my idea. Clearly 'Bob' was in a position to steal my idea right from under me and not even care enough to buy the associated domain name off of me. He didn't even know the difference between the Intenets and Atari.
So then 'Bob' turned the conversation to middle age frustrations, selling your dreams and 'there's a lot more money to be made in your industry vs. mine'.
Me: But dude, it's only money. Money is not a means to an end. When aliens take, er, I mean when the global economy collapses, what will Bill Gates do with his buckets of money? Or his technology? There WON'T EVEN BE POWER (unless you're in with the aliens I silently said to myself, winking.)
Bob: Yeah, but a nice cold bucket of money sounds good right about now.
Me: That's the problem with the world today. People settling for second best. What's a bucket of money worth compared to a dog? I, for one, would rather have a bucket of dogs, AND I DON'T EVEN LIKE DOGS. I'M AN EFFING CAT PERSON AND I WOULD RATHER HAVE A BUCKET OF DOGS OVER A BUCKET OF MONEY ANY DAY OF THE WEEK.
Then Invariable Silence opened the door of the Town Car and sat down between us. She's a good friend of mine, so I didn't mind so much.
Then it hit me like a bolt of lightening. Dogs are SO money. Imagine a world where you can play frisbee with your cash before you take it to the store (while it's tail is wagging, even)? Unpleasant necessities like buying hemorrhoid medication could turn into a walk in the park. Literally. You won't need an app to tell you what the dill-e-o is on Wall Street today. Just look out your window and see how many loose dogs are running around. Like, Irish Wolf Hounds will be the new hundred dollar bill.
And so I bought it. Before anyone else could. DogsAreCurrency.com. Yeah baby. It's only a matter of time before the Federal Reserve boys come a knockin' on my door.
Posted by Jennifer at 3/13/2010 8:40 AM 
Categories: Awesome domains that you can buy from me for a 15 thousand percent markup, Making the world a better place
Tags: i know you agree with me but are afraid to admit it in public this idea will really knock your socks off
Categories: Awesome domains that you can buy from me for a 15 thousand percent markup, Making the world a better place
Tags: i know you agree with me but are afraid to admit it in public this idea will really knock your socks off
I propose we call this new currency 'dogllars' which, by the way, would also be a great domain name.
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Dude, that's pure genius WALKING AROUND ON FOUR LEGS!!!!!
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